Most of us spend more than half of our waking lives in the office and its unsurprising that you’ll meet someone you can’t stand. It can be a noisy eater, a complainer, or a bossy teammate. Whatever reason you may have, this can be a problem when it interferes with your work.
It’s highly unlikely that you will like everyone in your workplace but it’s important to address conflicts that may arise from the buildup of negative emotions.
Here are some things you can do to develop a better relationship with the colleague you dislike.
- Deal with the problem
Most of the time, we avoid conversations with people we don’t like. Rather than confront a person we develop coping mechanisms to be able to tolerate bad behavior.
While this is easier, it rarely makes a difference to the situation. Its better to have that difficult (but honest) conversation that could possibly bring you long term benefits.
- Assess your personal narrative
We don’t always know how other people perceive us. You may see yourself as quiet and thoughtful, but others may interpret this as being aloof or restrained. Sometimes you will get people telling you that you’re very intimidating when you regard yourself as a very approachable person.
In a situation like this, everyone is simply misunderstanding each other. Therefore, it is also important to check if your views of yourself coincide with other people’s perception.
- Ask their views
Oftentimes we communicate to persuade others of our views. But to have a constructive conversation, you must be genuinely interested in listening and understanding another person’s standpoint. One of the ways you can show that you understand them and to build rapport is by summarizing back to them what they said.
Keep in mind that your coworker’s actions are probably not personal and are not meant to annoy you intentionally. To create better working relationships, be willing to let go of your assumptions and consider other people’s ideas and viewpoints.
Remember that as long as you can effectively work with your colleagues, you are not required to like a person you are in conflict with. And if you do all these things and remain honest and open, you may find your dislike for your coworker slowly fade and you’ll start enjoying the time working with them.